What Writing About Personal Experience Teaches

What Writing About Personal Experience Teaches

by | Feb 1, 2021 | Guest Blog, Writing | 0 comments

What Writing About Personal Experience Teaches

By Writing Gym Alumnae Sonee Singh

I have been in the Writing Gym for eight months and it has transformed the way I write. The program has pushed me to expand and explore my writing in unexpected ways. I am in the midst of editing a women’s fiction novel, yet I have realized there is value in writing about my personal experiences.

I enjoy writing fiction, because it allows me to explore the unfamiliar. I write characters unlike myself and have them participate in activities I would not normally engage in. However, fiction also allows me to explore the familiar. I write about traits within me or people I know, give my characters my hobbies or interests, and place them in settings I have visited. I give a voice to the experiences in my life under the cover of made-up scenes.

Salons are an integral part of the Writing Gym experience. In these salons, Annalisa Parent, who runs the Writing Gym, provides us a writing prompt and gives us 20 minutes to write non-stop. We take turns sharing our writing and providing feedback in a way that highlights strengths in our pieces.

Salons have helped me gain confidence as a writer, discover skills in my writing that I didn’t know were in me, and build a supportive bond with my fellow writers.

A couple of weeks ago, Annalisa did something unexpected, and asked us to write about a personal experience. I panicked. When I have written about myself in the past, no one knew. Now they would and it made me feel naked. Salons are safe environments, but I felt exposed.

It’s natural to feel vulnerable. When we share our personal stories, we open ourselves to criticism. It shouldn’t matter what other people think. After all, writing is something we do for ourselves. Still, we need to get over the fear of judgment, and that takes courage. It can be freeing and empowering.

Writing about our experiences forces us to look within.

This can lead us to recall the positive and joyful moments, but anytime we peer into the recesses of our past, we also run the risk of finding buried hurts, shunned memories, or dulled pain. It exposes that which we never intended to see the light. It exposes what we have lived through, and what we have survived.

There is a benefit in that. It allows us to accept what happened to us– good and bad.

We can’t change our history, but we don’t have to hold on to it.

Accepting the past helps us heal. It helps us release. It allows us to let go of the experience, let go of what it holds within us, and let go of the emotions that we attached to it. In bringing the past to light, it ceases to fester, diminishing its significance.

It is not about exposing ourselves. It is about unburdening. It is about the catharsis. And that has another consequence. Sharing is authentic. Sharing gives a voice to our experiences, and it makes our writing unique. It makes us relatable. It also allows us to feel lighter. At least it has done for me. After the salon where I shared my story, I felt oddly liberated, and it brought a smile to my face. It opened up something for me– a sense of ease I hadn’t felt before. I was motivated to do more.

I encourage everyone to be open to writing about personal experiences. It may result in a pleasant surprise.

While in the Writing Gym, not only has Sonee revised her women’s fiction to publishable, she has also published two poetry anthologies.
Want to know how you can get the same results?

A Writer’s Worst Enemy (It’s Not What You Think)

A Writer’s Worst Enemy (It’s Not What You Think)

by | Jan 27, 2021 | Overcome Writer's Block, Writing | 0 comments

A Writer’s Worst Enemy (It’s Not What You Think)

 

I’m here to talk about a writer’s worst enemy, and I can promise you, it’s not what you think.

Lots of writers talk to me about writer’s block. They’re not sure what to write, and feel stuck. They don’t know where to go, what to say next, or what their next chapter should be.

I think I’ve heard it all, but we put that all under the umbrella of writer’s block. Most people get stuck and they don’t know why, and I’m here to explain how you get stuck in writer’s block.

You’re not going to believe it, but what gets in the way is your own brain.

Many of you know that most of the work that I do over in the Writing Gym is based on my study of neuroscience, how the brain learns and creates, and the secret is this:

Your mind will tell you anything to keep you in the comfort zone.

When you sit down to write, which is a risky endeavor, you’re going to share it with the world. You’re sharing your most intimate thoughts. You’re sharing a story, whether it’s your own personal narrative, or close to it.

There’s risk. It’s scary. You might not get distracted and not get it done. You might get stuck and not find the right words.

There’s lots of scare factors, and your mind wants to keep you safe and comfortable.

It sends you these messages that say things like “you can’t do this,” “this is okay, but you could do this so much better.” These are lies that come from our brain to keep us comfortable.

If you want to be a successful writer, you need to get out of that negative feedback loop, and get into the right relationship with your inner critic.

Then, the writing can flow.
Then, you write with confidence.
Then, you can circumvent some of that negative feedback and know what your strengths are.

As a writer, I have confidence based on real facts, not empty praise like “good job.” That’s not real confidence.

If you’re ready to break out of that loop, you may have had it with writer’s block, being stuck, and letting your mind take control of your writing future. I’ve opened up some time in the next week or so to chat with writers who are serious about becoming their best writer, finally finishing that novel, and getting over fear to get the writing done. 

If you’re serious about finishing your novel this year, I’d love to chat. You can get on a call and talk about where you are, where you’d like to be, and how you can get there.

Until next time. Happy writing.

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How To Get a Manuscript Request in Twenty Minutes

How To Get a Manuscript Request in Twenty Minutes

by | Jan 14, 2021 | How to Publish, How to Revise a manuscript, Uncategorized | 0 comments

How To Get A Manuscript Request in Twenty Minutes

 

Do these statements ring true for you?

  • You struggle to finish or publish your book.
  • You feel like you’ve tried everything: you’ve read the books, taken the classes, attended the workshops, read every article that exists on the internet about how to write and get published. 
  • You feel frustrated or incompetent because you haven’t been published yet.

You’re not alone, writers. I work with many writers to get past these very same issues, and today I want to share with you how I helped one of these writers finally get published.

When Barbara came to me, she had done the work–oh boy had she done the work. She even had an MFA (a Master of Fine Arts), which many writers consider to be the pinnacle of a writer’s career.

But the problem with an MFA is though the classes teach you how to write, they fail to teach you how to publish.

In fact, one of the biggest complaints the agents I work with have about MFA writers is their manuscripts are cookie cutter. Most agents can sniff out an MFA manuscript from a mile away. They’re all the same, which doesn’t give them that edge to be publishable. 

This was Barbara’s issue: she had a great concept, but needed to break out of the MFA mold and transform her manuscript into something agents would scramble to represent. 

Barbara and I worked on revisions over the course of several months. During that time, I was in conversation with several agents about Barbara, her manuscript, and how to position her book for optimal success. 

What was incredible about working with Barbara is for the first time in her writing career, the revision process was not a stress-ridden nightmare for her, but enjoyable. Barbara and I laughed together during our meetings and enjoyed each other’s company, because she finally felt she was on the right track to publication. 

When Barbara finished revising, I sent her synopsis to an agent I work with frequently. Within 20 minutes of reading the synopsis, she asked me for a full manuscript. 

Let that sink in. 

20 minutes. 

Have you waited days, weeks, even MONTHS to hear back from an agent–only to get a “no thanks, not for me”? 

Imagine getting a yes in 20 minutes. 

 Many would-be authors spin their wheels for years trying the same things over and over again, hoping for new results. Worse: they piddle their money away one workshop, one class, one MFA at a time. 

Real results ARE possible, but you’ve got to be willing to take the right steps.

I work with authors who are coachable–so eager to publish that they’re willing to put in hard work.

The authors I work with authors every day are tired of spinning their wheels, ready for real results, and ready to invest in themselves in order to get there.

I work with authors who take writing and publishing seriously without taking themselves too seriously. 

If that sounds like you, and you’re really ready, I’ve opened some spots in my calendar to talk with you about where you are, where you’d like to go, and how you can get there. Click here to choose a time to book yourself directly into my calendar, and we can hop on a call and chat.

Until next time. Happy Writing.

This Simple But Effective Practice Will Drastically Improve Your Writing

This Simple But Effective Practice Will Drastically Improve Your Writing

by | Jan 6, 2021 | How to Write a Novel, Writing | 0 comments

This Simple But Effective Practice Will Drastically Improve Your Writing

 

Have you been dealing with surges of overpowering emotion?

In a single day, do you feel like you experience the full range of human feeling, from anger to sadness to fear to love to joy?

Many of us are experiencing new and more powerful emotions than ever before. At times, this can feel quite overwhelming, because we haven’t been taught how to deal with so many emotions at once.

As a writer, you have an edge. Writing is the perfect medium to release your crazy, pent-up feelings. 

There’s even more good news for writers: strong emotions are a gift for your writing that will benefit you for years to come, as long as you don’t ignore them.

That’s why I want to give you a tip I usually reserve for the writers over in the Writing Gym. These are crazy times, and I want to make sure you have all the tools you need to not only get through, but come out a better writer.

Here is a simple practice to capture and channel strong emotions through your writing:

  1. Strong emotions are usually felt somewhere in the body. When feelings of fear, anger, or uncertainty arise, take a moment and close your eyes, focus on where you feel it in your body, and think about exactly how this emotion feels. 
  2. Ask yourself: Is it a sharp pain? A fluttery lightness? A dull aching? A pressing heaviness? Like the writer you are, think about the words you would use to describe what you feel. 
  3. Open your eyes and write it all down. Save it in a notebook or a file on your computer, and be sure to label what the emotion is. 

Not only will you feel better after releasing the emotion through your body and writing, but this will pay off in your future writing projects. Maybe five years from now, you’ll have a character who’s feeling something powerful, and you’ll have an example on how to describe any given feeling. 

You’ve been given the gift of emotional authenticity to add to your writing–take advantage of it. 

I’d love to hear if this strategy works for you. If you want to discuss more, I’ve set aside time in my calendar. Let’s chat. 

How To Avoid A Character Takeover

How To Avoid A Character Takeover

by | Dec 15, 2020 | How to Write a Novel, Overcome Writer's Block, Writing | 0 comments

How To Avoid a Character Takeover

I want to share a story about Sonee Singh, one of the members in the Writing Gym. Like many writers, Sonee has a very specific goal: traditional publication.

 Traditional publication is not easy, especially with strict industry standards. However for Sonee, the goal seemed unreachable, because she didn’t even have a completed novel. 

Sonee had trouble progressing with the plot of her novel. She felt stuck. She had most of the story put together, but saw holes, and wasn’t sure how to solve that problem.

In March of this year, Sonee had a draft of her novel that didn’t have a complete ending. She had an ending, but it wasn’t where she wanted it to be.

She knew she needed more work and more clarity, but wasn’t sure how to get there. 

Her plot had big events that marked her protagonist’s journey, yet felt disjointed because nothing tied the bigger events together. 

Sonee looked at her work and felt frustrated, and considered dropping the piece altogether. 

I kept coming back to it, I just had no idea how to do it.

Sonee knew she had a story worth telling, but didn’t have the tools to express her writing the way she wanted. Reluctant to give the story up, she tried out some resources. 

She initially turned to beta readers that provided unhelpful, conflicting feedback. Afterwards, Sonee decided she had enough. 

She decided to reach out to me.

We began working together, and I read through her manuscript twice. After some revisions, she created a second draft.

The first revision focused on details such as character arc, plot arc, the big picture, and how these could be used to create a cohesive narrative.

Through discussions around the revisions, I was able to help Sonee organize her thoughts and equip her with tools needed to look at these details on her own. 

I also asked Sonee guiding questions about her plot and helped her realize how to solve any issue she comes across in her writing. 

As a professional, I know what you need to do to make your book better, but most importantly I value your voice and want you to create the solutions to your novel.  

I think the beauty of what Annalisa does is that she has that insight, but she also doesn’t just give the answer. She just poses questions that force me to come to that answer and I think it’s become a very organic process.

With my help, Sonee has had multiple breakthroughs in her writing, and is on the journey to finishing her novel with confidence. 

Before coming to me, Sonee knew she had a problem to fix, and traditional publishing was a far-off dream.

Today, Sonee believes she’s capable of meeting industry standards, and she’s one step closer to achieving her goal of traditional publication. 

I’m so happy to see Sonee grow as a confident writer, and am excited to see where she goes from here. 

Do you feel stuck in your writing and don’t know where to go next? Have publishing dreams but have no idea how to get there? Let’s chat.

Until next time. Happy writing. 

How Top Writers Are Using Quarantine To Publish

How Top Writers Are Using Quarantine To Publish

by | Dec 8, 2020 | How to Write a Novel, Writing | 0 comments

How Top Writers Are Using Quarantine To Publish

 

As you know, we are currently dealing with an international health crisis.

People experience a variety of feelings about this. Denial, stress, anger, fear, and panic–all of the natural feelings humans experience when faced with a crisis. 

However, here in the Writing Gym we are all about being real and having real solutions. 

I’ve been working with writers for a long time, and one of the most popular statements I hear from writers all over the world is this: “I wish I had the time to write.”

Here’s a new spin: you have been given the gift of time. What writers have always wished for is here. Use this time that you have been given to write.

But how? 

Perhaps you can find 15 minutes in the morning, or after the kids go to bed, to jot down some of your ideas.

Think about it. 15 minutes?

You could write at least 2 pages. If this goes on for a couple of weeks, you’re gonna have several chapters done by time we are out of our homes, embracing one another and socializing in person once again. 

Please use this time wisely. It’s a real gift to write. 

I’d like to give you a tip I usually save for the Writing Gym members. We are in a special time right now, and I want to be here for you. 

When you’re in a moment of strong emotions, like fear, anxiety, or anger, write it down. Write exactly what you’re feeling. Write it all down, and then save it in a notebook or a file on your computer. Title it “uncertainty,” “fear,” or whatever emotion you were feeling.

You’re creating for yourself a bank that you can go back to. 

Maybe 5 years from now, you’ve got a character who’s feeling uncertain, but you’re not sure how to convey emotional authenticity into your piece. Well, you’ve created a bank for yourself where you can access a distant memory of that emotion. 

At the Writing Gym, we always want to reframe things positively. Let me reiterate.

You’ve been given the time to write and you’ve been given the gift of emotional authenticity to really add to your writing. 

Until next time. Happy writing. 

If you’re serious about using quarantine to write and publish a book, drop yourself into my calendar for a chat. 

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